PHOOEY ON DOGS

by Mariane Holbrook 

I think that I shall never see
A dog as he's supposed to be;
A dog who, since he was a pup,
Just knows when he should just shut up.

I'm tired of hearing dogs just yap
And wake me when I take a nap.
Those boisterous creatures bark and growl,
Bay at the moon and screech and howl.

They never do a lick of work,
They run around like they're berserk.
They irritate like hordes of gnats;
I wish that dogs were more like cats.

For cats are quiet, sweet, demure
And known for being clean and pure.
But dogs are different, that's the truth
And, more than that, they're just uncouth.

But lest you think I'm most unkind
Because all dogs I have maligned,
And all dogs don't incur my wrath;
Just those who never take a bath.