BUMPY ROADS

by Mariane Holbrook

She calls them "bumpy roads."

My best friend, Dee, who has suffered from the insidious and debilitating disease, Sarcoidosis, for nearly 30 years, has many days that are so pain-filled she should call them "train wrecks." Instead, with her determined spirit, her sunny smile and unshakeable faith in God, she terms them "bumpy roads."

She does this out of compassion for her friends and family who worry about her, who fret because she seems to have more pain on her plate than most people are served in a lifetime.

She calls her hard, pain-filled days "bumpy roads" because to dwell on them would defeat her, lessen her resolve, turn her joy into melancholy.

And through each bumpy road day, she still finds time to sew little round white buttons on the tummies of small stuffed teddy bears, her "McDougals", which she sends to anyone who writes her with a chronic illness who needs encouraging.

Hundreds, perhaps thousands, of people of every age all over the world have received a "McDougal." Dee asks the recipient to gently rub the little tummy button whenever the pain is too great to bear. It's just a diversion but it works. I know. I have a McDougal.

More often than not, those who suffer most from chronic pain show the most compassion, exhibit the greatest faith, refuse to give an inch to despair.

That's Dee. She is remarkably capable, determined and unbowed. Lovingly caring for her elderly mother and worrying about her ailing son, she won't give up and won't give in.

Dee is my inspiration. Oddly, we've never met. A mutual friend introduced us online and we've become fast friends.

Both of us have physical challenges. We live a continent apart and may never meet on this earth. But we will one day meet in heaven.

For that day when we finally meet, for Dee I penned these lines:

"I may not recognize you by your face, my dearest friend, But I will recognize you by your heart."